LOVE,LOSS AND LIFE..........

Hello Readers
its been a long time, i hope everyone is doing well. I stumbled on my blog and i thought to give it another go at blogging,for those who know me surely know that i suffered the greatest loss of all, i lost my husband in October of 2016,the father of my two young children,my best friend, my all in all.
Words cant seem to describe the pain of it all,i am still in shock and i really dont know when i will come to the reality of it all,God is healing my heart slowly but surely,we all need time to grieve and we all know grieve in different ways ,some bottle up their emotions and others are very open in their pain.

I bottle up my emotions, i have cried so many times in so many ways at different points in time,sometimes alone other times in front of few people,if tears could bring him back he would be with us ,but it is appointed once for man to die and after that comes judgement,did he deserve to die?Who deserves to die,but death is inevitable and at the door step for every living soul.
To be loved even for a short period is better than to live for long and never known love,my husband was not a mushy emotional die hard lover but i knew love ,i felt loved and i saw love with the things he did for me and the ways he cared for us, he was a loyal son, friend and brother to his family,you could call on him at any point in time to help you out and he would be there ,even abandoning us his immediate family to go and help.
My life has changed in an instant,i am no longer the person i used to be,death has stripped me from my loved one, i am an empty shell, death o death where is thy sting,Yakubu was full of life and so much energy,he took each day as it came,he never held a grudge for long,he loved life and was a lover of nature and passionate about his bikes.
If i could go back in time i would change a million things,stopped a few things and told him how much i loved him but he knew and for that i am very grateful that till the end he knew how much i felt about him.
I feel him all around me,i only know that i cant seem him,we talk about him almost everyday and it still feels like he is here with us,time they say is the greatest healer of all,i am allowing the love and grace of God to come and fill my heart, i see life now in a different way,i take nothing so serious anymore,i am learning to take it day by day and allow nature to take its course,the next second is not promised to neither any of us so let go and love each day as it comes,people and negative situations will always be a part of our daily life,but we can choose to make ourselves happy despite the circumstance we find ourselves in,choose your own kind of happy and dont let other people dictate to you what you call your "happy place"........................ For now i will leave with a few pictures of him and i pray everyone who reads this say a little prayer for Yakubu Kitchener....OCT 15TH 1980- OCT 29TH 2016.